I guess it is jealousy. Now he is surrounded by love and caring friends, the same people who wanted nothing to do with him a week ago. Reconnecting with them and here I am crying my eyes out. No one is surrounding me. My life is steady but I live like the rest of us functioning people, go to work, come home.
I feel shut out. I almost feel like calling him and finally losing my marbles after holding it in for so many months but again, no point in that. He needs to take care of himself. I'm glad. No one is going to take care of me, but me. I do a great job at it but wouldn't it be nice if I could 'vanish' for several months. Its just making me so sad. Not to mention he is an avoider of anything hugely emotional and I'm sure he senses that I'm an emotional Mt. Vesuvius about to erupt. I feel like that. Letting off steam here and there but I sense a huge meltdown coming on.