Originally Posted by
crystal226 
Lying about spending money, drinking at work, drinking in the car, drinking daily and drinking in excess amounts.
*snip*
He was following me around yelling at me and being verbally abusive and wouldn't let up about some small issue
And your hubby thinks you had a "perfect life"?
Hm. Really.
Well maybe it was "perfect" for him, in that he could get blotto and be reckless, you would go along with it.
Originally Posted by
crystal226 We were so happy before and now I feel lost and like I am a bad person who is destroying ten years of marriage because of one difficult weekend.
Hold the phone. You are NOT the bad guy for finally shinning the light on what is a BIG problem in your marriage. Just because you came to a realization does not make you Bad Guy of the Year. Your AH is simply blameshifting because god forbid he point the finger at himself.
Originally Posted by
crystal226 I decided a few days ago that I am going to spend 2 weeks at my parents house to relax and get away from the negativity for a while and try and sort things out. I'm worried because i'm not sure I am going to want to come back unless I see some drastic changes, but it just doesn't seem right to throw ten years down the drain in two months and I'm not sure what other options I have because living with addiction is not the life I want for myself.
You're being very honest here. You know what you don't want, and you've given yourself the gift of space, so you can figure out what to do next. Perhaps you should also give yourself the gift of time, and not rush coming to a conclusion NOW. When in doubt, do nothing. Perhaps after some reflection, you'll come to another realization...
Originally Posted by
crystal226 My husband is also quite upset because according to him he was blindsided by everything. He feels I have never really complained about the drinking and that he thought up until two months ago we had the perfect life.
So, your husband who has shown himself to be abusive towards you is angry, at you, for no longer playing the role HE scripted for you, i.e. the role of the accepting wife who keeps her mouth shut?
Tough luck buddy.
If there's anyone who has any right to be angry, it's you.