Originally Posted by
LawMama 
... I don't truly understand what my higher power is....that I am resisting. I feel like some of my anxiety and irritability would subside if I could turn things over to my higher power but it is still a struggle for me.
What makes you think any of us "understand" what our higher power is?
I have yet to meet anyone who can define their higher power better than they can define UFO's. "Understand" has nothing to do with it.
Willingness is the key. Open-mindedness is the only requirement to start with. Trust is the best we can end up with.
Not that some struggle is not required. Go ahead, give it your best shot. When you have given it a 100% effort - surrender, detach, let go.