to SR... glad you wish to do something about your drinking... you are making a great decisions. Nothing is good about drinking, it actually robs us of so many things in life, and of course our physical and mental health.
Read and post to this community, you will find great support, inspiration, and friendship.
One day at a time or one minute at a time, it is whatever it takes to get through a day sober. Your self esteem will come back, it takes sober days to make this happen. Sending hugs and positive thoughts.