(((Maki))) - Welcome to SR!!!
A lot of people, here, have been where you are. Alcohol wasn't my "thing", crack was but I did a lot of damage, on it, and hit a pretty low bottom.
I don't know often you're drinking, but would just like to recommend you see a dr. and get checked out...be honest about your drinking. Alcohol withdrawals can be very serious, even fatal, and it's always best to get medical advice.
Hugs and prayers,
Amy