Originally Posted by HurtingAgain

As the wife of an alcoholic, I can tell you with absolute certainty that the thing that hurts the most about this disease is the lies and dishonesty it brings to the marriage. Your wife probably already has a feeling that something is going on, and it's the constant sneaking around and deception and trying to figure out what's really going on that makes the sober spouse feel as if they're going crazy. The lying is the main reason why I'm not sure my marriage can be saved, because whether AH gets sober or not, the foundation of trust in our marriage has been completely broken down.

IMO, you can never go wrong with being honest.