I did both. I let her come after the first two detox, and thankfully she chose a detox/rehab facility the last time. The difference was night and day for all of us.
After the first detox, she abstained from her DOC for about 6 months but was not sober. She ended up at detox again within a couple of months of relapsing. Two hours after getting out she was at it again. About a year later she was in rehab, and all points in between were hell for everyone, though I couldn't see the forest for the trees at the time.
She's mostly been home ever since, because her behavior changed and mine too. I learned boundaries and became strong enough again to enforce them. I base everything on behavior and don't take any of her stuff personally. It's taken a ton of therapy and those 12 steps for me to do that.
I am not her warden or drill sergeant, and since she's an adult with an addiction, parenting had to stop, too. My RAD is 22 and rehab was very emphatic that we have to stop trying to parent legally adult addicts. If they want/need our advise, it's up to them to ask for it.
My RAD and I both needed some substantial, individual recovery before finding this much calmer place in our lives. We both have to keep working it every day if there's any hope for it to continue.
My daughter knows the Salvation Army offers free rehab because we've had a discussion about it. She knows we won't pay for another rehab if she relapses again, and she accepts that with grace and humility. She did some research into the SA's rehab program and ended up sharing it with an old friend, who's in their program right now.