I obsess about rediculous stuff.
It is homecoming here and I was going to take the boys to the football game. I was looking forward to it, we've been having a fun week. My 11yo called his dad to see if he'd take him. I didn't think he'd even get a call back, much less a yes but xah did decide to come down and take them to the game.
I asked xah if he wanted me to come along (we also have two 4yo's that are probably not going to be much fun after half time) or stay back. He didn't say either way but since it wasn't a yes and he mumbled something about his phone, I stayed behind. The 9yo wanted me to go. He has a night planned out with friends and is as bad as I am about last minute changes.
So did I do the right thing by staying behind? I never know. Should I have just went. We can be civil for two hours at a football game but saying it would be uncomfortable would be a massive understatement. I still feel sick when they leave or I drop them off. It all just feels so wrong all the time no matter what.
I do not do well with last minute change of plans. I can't figure out the simplest of situations sometimes. I obsess about doing the right thing in social situations, or about what people are *really* thinking, or if I'm being a dummy, or......endless.
I'm having a moment.
