If it's any consolation, I am in a similar situation with my niece and nephew who I was close to since the day they were born. I have not been able to see them in years. Their mother is a practicing alcoholic (and likely still practicing drug addict) who does not want ANY interference to live her life the way she wants to live it, i.e., don't work, drink whenever, and ignore and neglect her children. If she allowed us to see them, she knows there would be consequences to her sick behavior. There is nothing left for me to do but give it over.