It was difficult for me to comprehend why...when i removed the problem..ie the booze that my mind and actions became more problematical...
The mental turmoil and anguish continued....how can that be.
similar problems in my life.......like gambling and womanising seemed to be sorted.
stop going to the bookmakers and stay within my marriage vows....i did that without to much of a problem.
But that bloody booze......that invisible spring in my gut...ever tighten till i turned to the only solution.........the comfort of those first drinks and the mayhem to follow.
My sponsor explained it like this..........the booze is the cracks in the wall......the real problem is deep in the foundation...undermined by a life time of twisted life styles and perceptions..
and guess what.........the problems of your own making..lol.....
My first real eye opening moment of that life style was reviewing my 4.
Here i start to see the patterns......the bile and poison festering in my mind.
it was a bitter pill to swallow.
so now i start to see the guts of the problem.......the complete opposite to how i lived, was life founded in spiritual principles.
and have a reliance on a power greater than me..
that became an option because i was all out of other options.
finally i start to get peace between my ears....and cease to be a whirlwind.