Welcome to SR Clay,
I'm glad that it became clear to you that you have a problem with alcohol and that you decided to do something about it. I can relate to several of the points in your list, and also to the situation of not living close to your family/ not knowing how to tell those close to me and living outside of my home country. (I actually live in Germany too, maybe that's why I immediately understood your nickname)
I think there has already been some good advice and links. I can only add some of my own story: I remember that in early sobriety I felt a strong urge to tell people close to me what was going on. My parents know that I don't drink any alcohol anymore and I didn't even have to say anything, they just noticed the positive changes in my attitude towards life. Because of the distance, and because they never saw me drunk , I am not sure how much they knew about the extent of my drinking- but they must have sensed that something wasn't right with me. I was torn because I didn't want them to worry and after a lot of consideration I decided to not bring it up unless they would. Many other people around me who might not even have known I about my drinking have noticed the positive change anyways and I didn't need to say it. Do what feels right to you and if it doesn't no need to rush things.
I have now been sober for roughly 14 months and I have only told a handful of people so far, most of the time I just did it when I felt I was ready and that the time and situation felt right. I was really lucky that so far, everyone has taken me seriously and been understanding and supportive.
I think for many non-alcoholics it is just hard to comprehend that it is not a thing of self-discipline and that "drinking just one occasionally", or just "stopping after a couple" does not work for alcoholics like us, because for them it is not a problem. And it is hard for a non-alcoholic to understand how one could continue to drink although it makes one suffer. I wish you that your girlfriend will be able to better understand what you are going through once she has read some information about it.
Especially in the beginning it is important focus on your sobriety and getting better, and the rest will work itself out over time too. Keep reading and posting, ther will be a lot of people here to support you. I wish you all the best and a lot of courage,
LS