Piggle--your post touched me. I'm a codependent who stayed and so far, it's working. My A is in recovery and a better person for it. I did lots of things that enabled him for a long time, and I guess I feel guilty about that, but I was in the dark about this illness and didn't really take action until I understood it better. That took time. I guess each relationship is different. Some marriages are bad with or without drinking. I have a great marriage that was nearly destroyed by drinking until we both committed to getting better. One day at a time!
marie