Absolutely right on Nan. My Hp does not require me to fake myself out with a whole lot of whatever to have that winning smile or wonderful attitude 24/7. Sober living is a way of life, not a slogan or motto for getting sober.
My HP has (had) my back whether I'm (was) drunk, dry, or sober. It's really my choices that make the difference for me, not my HP waiting on me for the proper way forward. My HP don't wait for nothing. Its always go go go. LOL.
Spiritual living is the key to sobriety I'm all in agreement with but that does not mean I had zero spiritual experiences while I was drinking. Some of my finest moments of spiritual experience were when I was drunk and stoned and dying. Some. Not all and not (obviously) the best. Sober living is by far the best of the best for me. If not, sobriety would not work long for me, and my alcoholism would win the day.
I have come to an understanding of my HP (God) that allows me to be both my best and my worst and everything in between and I'm still loved and helped. I am never tossed aside, forgotten, or punished by my HP so for me it's never a question of what or what not is my God but who and what am I in relationship with God! Do I love God? Do I love others as I love myself? Am I sober because I'm just not drinking or am I sober because I live a sober spiritual life? And other things....
A God of our own understanding. For you Nan, that would mean exactly what you posted. Go with it. Just be ready to defend your growing understanding from your own misunderstandings of the very HP you have come to begin to understand. For me, I always have an open mind to my own critical thoughts and feelings. I do not ignore my own wonderings and searches for Truth. My understandings themselves are not written in stone; what is written in stone is simply this and this alone: A God of my own understanding.
My understandings change and grow and mature. Some are kept. Some are dropped forever. Some are not fully experienced enough for me to decide either way. I always begin at square one though: I'm a sober alcoholic first, last, and always. Its worked the same since day one so thats The Way for grateful sober me.
((Ananda))
Robby