Originally Posted by
Aurora80 
Thanks everyone for your replies. I'm trying to focus on the good aspects of my humiliation, like I'm much less judgmental than I might have been otherwise. And yes, it's definitely motivation to stay sober. It's also strengthened me spiritually, and I'm also much less inclined to gossip about other people, especially about what may be humiliating to others.
Even so, it's really hard sometimes when I'm doing something as mundane as washing dishes and I'm assaulted by a humiliating memory
I know eventually time will fade these things, because there are a couple things I once cringed about (from like 6 years ago) that don't really bother me now. I just hope these wounds heal sooner rather than later.
Also just wanted to add, these are not things I have to make amends for... unless maybe I have to make amends to myself.
Aurora, One of the toughest things I ever had to do, was to forgive myself. I made alot of mistakes in life too. And I was wrong. I paid the price for what I had done, and I needed to forgive myself. When we think of forgiveness we think of forgiving another person. We don't think of ourselves. When a very spiritual woman from church told me to forgive myself and move on, it opened my eyes. We all make mistakes, and drugs and alcohol cause us to do things we would never do sober. Forgive yourself. And go forward. You will heal.