I wish I could tell you what you want to hear, but that would be counterproductive.
My parents are on the road to going through the same things you have. Some of it they have already experienced. They have lost their home and gone through bankruptcy, not to mention putting off taking care of themselves, all in the name of rescuing my sister. And you know where it has gotten them? Nowhere. She is currently hiding from the police, and they still don't have their house, their financial reputation, or anything to retire with, and my dad is not in good health, at all. He won't be able to work long enough to retire at this point, and it's all because they were desperate to help sis, just like you are desperate to help your son.
They have never once given her a chance to hit her bottom. Because of this, her bottom gets deeper and deeper, and I'm starting to wonder if she'll ever change, as long as they have a way to enable her.
I know it's hard to think this through, but if your son is still an addict, he's not thinking clearly, and there is nothing you can say to him to convince him that anything logical is right. We who are not in addiction know that there is no reason to be ashamed of add, adhd, depression, etc, and we know that the logical thing to do is get professional help. But logic does not work on the brain of an addict. They have their own system of "logic." And there is nothing logical about it.
Remember the three "c's": you didn't cause it, you can't change it, and you can't control it. Don't ever lose sight of those three facts.