sandrawg

Good advice-I would be lost without my various lists! to-do lists, business priorities lists, etc.

There's a Japanese business philosophy called Kaizen. It's all about chipping away at a big task with little steps...not trying to accomplish too much all at once. It's a very successful approach. Often we feel so overwhelmed by a big task (for ex, selling your house), that we're stuck in inertia. Trying to break a big task down to a series of smaller, more manageable tasks, helps keep anxiety at bay and also gives us a sense of accomplishment when we can cross the smaller tasks off our list.

For ex., when selling your house you have a lot of sub-tasks, such as 1) finding a realtor, 2) getting an appraisal done ,3) fixing up various parts of the house, etc.

OP, it's true, you ask yourself "how did I get here" (like in the Talking Heads song). It was a slow, gradual slide. You didn't go into this thinking, I'd really like to be married to an alcoholic! Of course not. But just lke alcoholism is progressive, so too is codependency. We just end up letting go in all kinds of ways of our boundaries and limits, til we get to the point of insanity.

At that point we either hit bottom and realize we have to start over, like you and I are doing, or we just let denial keep flowing like a river in Egypt and keep tolerating the pain, drama, etc.

I for one am glad I am moving on.