I want to royally curse him out. I feel that urge to do it and rip into him. I want to give him hell for all the things he has done to me (stealing, lying) and the things he has not done (in and out of my life, rehabs, etc.). I know that I will not gain anything out of it but it sure would feel good to bury him with words.
How did you get past those urges to tongue lash your ex addict? I'm relly struggling here.
Many times I didn't get past the urge. I could spew venom out of my mouth that I was shocked and appalled at. Who knew little miss Callie could hang with the sailors with her foul mouth. (I don't usually cuss at all) I could rip him to shreds. He wouldn't have a leg to stand on. Any response to my outbreaks only fueled my fire. I always could talk circles around him, but when it came to him defending or lying or whatever about addiction...I've never, ever talked to anyone ever like I did him. Throw my words in with some pushing and shoving on my part when I'd find him nodded out upstairs @ 3 am. It got ugly, several times.
It did nothing. It didn't change anything. At all. The only thing it did do was make me feel bad for saying such things and beat him down even further. Nothing positive came of it. He didn't change a thing because of my words. I agree with the others do what you can do to avoid all of the quacking. It just makes you upset. Actions are what you need to see. You don't need to hear his words. I've always been confrontational when I felt I was right. It doesn't work with an addict. At all.