Originally Posted by
almay777 
Whats stopping me from stopping if this makes sense is how bad I feel. I am scared of something bad happening to me.
Do you mean that you are hungover and fear withdrawal? Or how bad you feel emotionally?
With full disclosure that I have not quit 100%, I'll say that they key to getting through a night for me is PLANS. I will tell my husband in the morning that I'm going to the gym at 7pm (or whatever). And then I'll mark out pages of a book to read. And I'll go to the market and choose a special tea to drink that night. It sounds mind numbing I known but over time these are things I really enjoy now (that I would have totally rolled my eyes at not even 6 months ago).
But I follow those plans like I follow other events on my calendar. I just do it.
FWIW I drank as much (or even more) than you do. I did stop cold turkey (which I know is not advised but I had random RARE and involuntary sober days that never caused any ill-health. I am a 'slow' drinker so I'd drink say 8 drinks in 6 hours... Don't know if that makes a difference in terms of assessing your withdrawal risk).
Did you talk to your husband yet? I'm not at a point where I'm ready to face a lifetime of sobriety but I am more than ready to start to build a life where alcohol is no longer my 'go to' for everything. So that's what I told him. That I was looking to find new ways to celebrate, grieve, de-stress, socialize. And that I was going to do an 'experiment' and stop drinking as part of my every day routine. It got me the support I needed. He is still drinking, actually but that's OK. He is not an alcoholic.
You can do it. I could not possibly count how many mornings I told myself that I wouldn't drink that night. And how many middle of the night panicky hours I would spend berating myself and promising myself I wouldn't drink. All to find myself pouring a huge glass at 4pm.
But make a plan for what you'll do INSTEAD of drinking. Without that plan I had no hope. It is embarrassingly shocking to me how much I enjoy the sober things. I returned a video the other night at 8pm with my kids. 8pm! And I could drive!! On Saturday someone unexpectedly came to the door at lunchtime (I was alone). I was dressed! And not hungover! (and not drinking a glass of wine 'because it's lunchtime on a weekend'). It's a whole new world.
You can do it.