:ghug3
Sorry you're having such a craptastic time of it right now. The only suggestion I have is that the situation between your BF and his STBX is HIS BUSINESS. You can offer support etc - but you have to take care of yourself first. Stop worrying about making life more stressful for the BF and start worrying about your stress, your boundaries and what you will and will not tolerate in your life. If you can't handle the drama, ask that he doesn't relate it to you. Let him know it is a trigger for you. There is nothing you can do about his STBX and really, you don't need to know. Please make taking care of you a priority, as hard as that seems. Is he in Al Anon? Does he have someone else he can talk to about this that isn't so closely involved?