Congratulations on your sobriety!
Welcome to the other side of recovery (loved ones addiction)!
You (in some form or another) took step one as an alcoholic:
You admitted your powerlessness over alcohol and admitted your life had become unmanageable.
Taking step one from the other side of recovery:
Admitting you are powerless over alcohol and your life has become unmanageable, is a tough step to take - AGAIN.
For me it meant admitting that the marriage was not all that it appeared to be on the outside. It meant admitting that the marriage was not all that I believed it was (fantasy thinking). It meant admitting that my partner was beyond my control, and I had to accept that for my own serenity.
I wanted my A to wake up and smell the coffee! I wanted my A to get with the program and embrace sobriety so we could live happily ever after.
And I really wanted my A to stop drinking so it would stop reminding me how irresponsible my own behavior had been.
I had to forgive myself.
Then I had to forgive my A for not being what I wanted him to be.
Then I began my recovery from the other side of the street..