L told me he was an alcoholic. He told my family he was an alcoholic. He hid his drinking from me and my family, but openly did it in front of some of his friends. Now he does it in front of all his friends. Does it make sense? No. Is it consistent? No. Will I/we ever understand it? No. Will it make sense if we analyze it? No. This is where the accepting things I cannot change comes into play.