Hello!
Do you ever watch Jayne Velez Mitchell on CNN Headline News? She is a recovering alcoholic who drank during her years dating men. She was not honest with herself and living a lie. She said that drinking helped her to cover it up.
Now that you're sober really take time to discover the real you. Maybe you're a lesbian, maybe bisexual, who knows? Only you. As for your mom saying that "it's not the life she planned for you and how difficult that lifestyle is," she is speaking from love and concern, but don't believe her on the "how difficult that lifestyle is" part. She means well but that's baloney. I know many many gay people who lead full fantabulous lives, including myself.
The important thing here is for you to be true to yourself, 100%. Whatever your truth is, the family will come around.