Originally Posted by
laurie6781 
I am not a failure and you don't have to be either!
Thank you for starting this thread ...................... it's a great reminder to me of what it was like!
Love and hugs,
Thanks very much. Well, the "failure" part is all me, and my wife. As far as life itself goes, and aside from my liver... I still haven't managed to do any irreparable damage: I'm still well regarded in my field of endeavor; since I got my present job 27 years ago (which is, not coincidentally, when my heavy drinking started... 'nother story), I've never been in danger of losing my wife, my car, my house, my job or my family or friends. I have become well known in my small world, and have worked myself up a couple of steps into a management position. It's only temporary, but it still opens doors.
As far as I have been able to discern, the vast majority of my colleagues— although many do know I'm a "hard drinker" and "like to party" in the right settings— have no idea what I've done to myself. Am I kidding myself? Maybe, but I don't think so. In my job I hear ALL the nasty rumors floating around; even more now than before.
But I can't get cozy; I realize I have a problem and I must do something. It's still scary, though. Afraid of what I'll "miss" by not drinking... *sigh* always something.