So my Joel died because I drank too much? Haha no offense, I know drinking DOESN’T HELP but my brother wasn’t killed in Iraq because I drink. And my Uncle died because he had a stroke. No cos of my drinking.
And Ryan…well my alcoholism may have contributed to that but it was mostly him…I know drinking only makes me hurt more and only makes the bad things worse but the **** I’ve been through isn’t really because of my drinking, unless God is punishing me…in which case I wish I didn’t pi** him off so much.
*MAY TRIGGER FROM HERE ON PLEASE DON’T READ IF YOU DON’T THINK YOU CAN HANDLE THIS*
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I’ve been chugging the bottle I have here now. Honestly right now I don’t care if I live or die. I’m hurting so much. I called my shrink but she wasn’t there they were gonna connect me with the doctor on call but I said never mind. Things are bad.