I'm still here everybody!! 12 days sober and going strong. The withdrawals are over and I feel fantastic. I believe I have been given a 2nd chance and I have accepted that alcohol is no longer part of my life and I can never have a drink again. Acceptance for me was key.
Following up on that mammo and if another Dr. calls me at home to scare the $hit out of me....I think I will deck them...lol. I have a breast MRI in a few weeks to see what is going on and apparently they discovered so many things so I am just taking it easy and focusing on the positive. It is what it is. Drinking won't cure it and working myself up over won't either. I will wait for the results and proceed with next steps. Talk about a true test to stay away from the booze but the thought of drinking doesn't even cross my mind. The good Lord has given me a 2nd chance after that relapse and I pray that my MRI will come back showing everything as benign. I hope but I have to because if I didn't have hope then I would drowning and dead in alcohol.
Passed my employment physical and finalized all docs to start inprocessing next week to work on base!!!! Yayyyy. Working again will bring so much joy as I miss teaching and feeling I am contributing to life. I didn't do crappola as a drunk and wasted too many years so now I am all about getting on track and giving something back.
Ahhh...so the last unhealthy thing left is smoking. I want to quit and I have a great read that has been helping me understand that addiction (20 yrs) and it also has been helping me understand why I drank. I am afraid to ruin everything at the moment since being sober is my priority. I am maybe going to take a stab at it this weekend but might wait until my results from the MRI are in. Any thoughts on this guys?
Ok enough rambling for now and God Bless SR and this wonderful community for giving me the support that I need and seeing me through those dark hours a few weeks back.
Stay strong and stay sober