Nightwolf, some quality advice here from some really quality people. I struck up a relationship with sobriety almost a year ago at age 39. If I can do it, you can do it. Formerbeerlover summed it up well with, "you're never too old to get your life back." So true. You have decades to live a sober, fulfilling, pedal-to-the-metal life. I work out with guys at the gym your age (and older) who out benchpress me and outrun me in marathons. You obviously have some longevity in your genes with your mum still doling out excellent advice. Listen to her! And if AA isn't for you, so be it. People on this site way smarter than me recommend it, but I've never attended a meeting. That said, I wouldn't have gotten through the first month or so of my sobriety without support – from this website. Keep posting and take it all one day at a time. You can do it.