Originally Posted by
KeepPedaling 
You've been through a lot! What are you going to do for yourself this weekend? I'm planning to surround myself with friends and do something fun. I wish I could just have a down day once in a while, but if I do that, I get to thinking too much.
Hi KP! Sorry - I just figured out how to go back to posts. Lately I have not been doing good with the NC, unfortunately, but he is going back to sober in the day, raging drunk at night. So during the day, I have been taking advantage of sober.
It sucks I have to do it this way but he has almost gotten the storage unit cleaned out (should be done tomorrow) and he found a damn job (thank God) but doesn't start until May 1st.
So, for once I feel like things might fall into place and I will be able to cut all ties. But time will only tell. Only problem with this taking advantage (I hope that doesn't sound bad but any chance I can get to talk to him in a rational state, the easier it is for us to agree on what needs to happen to end this relationship for good) is that I have to read his mean words to me at night.
Dr. Jekyl / Mr. Hyde
Luckily, I have been to 4 Al Anon meetings - yes, I will overdose on information and meetings if that is what it takes - and I am learning to deal with things in a different matter. And because of this, he no longer calls me drunk because he knows I will no longer scream and defend myself, I will tell him "Ok ______. I am hanging up the phone now. Enjoy your evening" and then I hang up and then I no longer answer. So now I just get the texts.
I had a fellow Al-Anonian
ask me tonight how he was reacting to my new attitude. I thought for a minute and realized I hadn't even noticed because I didn't really care... WHAT?!? Me not care about what he thinks or if I hurt his feelings or if he is ok?!? HOLY CRAP!
Then I thought about it and realized he was not handling it that well and in a way (sadistic way), it made me smile because I realized he is losing control over me.
He realizes it too and now he is saying that he is not going to take my manipulation anymore... LMAO! My manipulation?!? Please...
He never got a response from me on that one either...
Keep up the good work Lady and keep busy and surrounding yourself with those people - that is all I have been able to do. If I sit at home, thinking - I feel as though I go backwards. I am thankful I get up and get away from my thoughts. It's what has been saving me!
:ghug3
Oh - and there are no down days for me either. I cram so much in a week it seems absolutely ridiculous. And I am pooped!