Bad Day Yesterday
I have been doing well - no major problems but yesterday was a nightmare. I was so full of ANGER. SO fed up with my life that there was no point trying to do the right thing and stay sober. Felt like throwing the whole lot up in the air and jumping head first into a downward spiral.
The only thing that kept me safe was a vague awareness that these were not my true thoughts and that I would not always feel like that. I sort of remembered that I hadn't felt like that the day before, but it was difficult to bring anything positive into that dark place.
I went home and ate loads of tasty food - fill to bursting almost - then slept for 2 hours. Woke up in the evening feeling a bit better but still bad.
This morning I am tired, but quiet and calm, and wondering what the fuss was all about. If I had gone with my crazy urges yesterday I would have been right back to square one.
I am SO glad I just got my head down and kept going. I feel yesterday has helped me confirm that when things get bad that I don't have to give up and take the weak way out.
I haven't wet myself or broken anything or offended anyone.
Today is a good day. I am taking my wife out. I don't want to drink.
Stu.