rerun, Im sorry for what you went through. I know it must be hard to relapse. That's why I dont drink. I dont think I am alcoholic but I cant drink because I cant risk losing my clean time. Every time I'd drink I end up using drugs. I had to abstain from all mood altering substances. It doesnot work for me to quit one without the other. Even now at 7 montsh clean, Im still unconsciously subsituting substances.Im binging on sweets because I was passing through a rough week. Thatn was an evident that my disease is still active. We have a disease that will always trick us to think we're fine now why dont I drink then next I find myself doing drugs waking up shaking. I try to protect my sobriety more than my life because if Im not clean and sober then i wont have a life.