I surrendered and recovered, he didn't...we tried to hold it together....didn't work.....too different....he was uncomfortable of me going to meetings (AA, NA, and Alanon) and called it a cult, brainwashing, (jealous or something /denial)....we just got too different....he didn't believe in HP......His disease has progressed.....he has lost everything......job, license, me.......is about to lose his house......SAD......I have gone NC ( no contact).......I am sad for him but very grateful for my recovery.....I tried for years with him....took him to 2 treatment centers.....2 detoxes....he ain't ready/may never be..The kids have had their own troubles with substances and driving issues......they don't have much to do with him but love him very much.........My Alanon sponser says him going to jail should have been an intervention/bottom for him but it wasn't....he served 6 months for DUI......I feel guilty I didn't do an intervention but my Alanon sponser says jail should have been anintervention for him...He cameout of jail real bitter blaming everyone else and I knew my marriage was over. Very sad.