Thank you, it always feels good to know I have friends that can relate. i realize I'm expecting someone to be considerate when she can only think of herself. This crack will destroy all in it's path. The 15 yr old is doing ok. She has gone to counseling as she has a tendency to hold her feelings in. I thought about getting her the codependency book to read but don't know if it would be to much for her. I proberly under estimate her as she has gone through alot and is quite mature for her age. I just want her to be a giggly teen girl. She's a good student and responsble but i see a sadness in her at times. I think she longs for what isn't there anymore. I tell her I have hope that someday mom will beat this, but I think gd lost that hope in her mom.