Hoo boy, I loved some of these posts. RABF and I live in our own units in next door seniors complex, and the only financial thing we share is the car we co-own.
He (sober) is an "everything in it's place, pick it up now, wipe it, sweep it up," clean freak.....AKA known as a pain in the rear.
I am an "I'll do that later, it isn't in the way, if I won't trip over it...it's fine, this is home...not home magazine," in my own time and when I am ready old lady.
We take it in turns to have dinner at each others place.
He takes care of the car, helps me with heavy stuff, potters in my little garden and tries to order me around.
I could no more go back to sharing a place with him, than fly.....I would be in gaol, ER or a mental hospital in a week if we did, either of trying to kill the other or gaga.
This is perfect, as each has our space, or bolt-hole to escape to when needed, and if he did relapse... I am able to detach and go NC with less cr*p than many others.
No arguaments over TV, on computer at 2am, reading or cuppa tea during night.
No pinching blankets or snoring, farts or other problems.
Yeah, way to go.
God bless