keithj

That's probably as far as you need to go with Step 2. Remember that around half the original AA members at the time the BB was written were atheist or agnostic coming in to the program. They recovered. For myself, I came into the program as a staunch atheist who thought the idea of a higher power was a crutch for weak-minded people. I recovered as well.

I did that by being shown the precise directions for Step 2. 'Do I now believe, or am I even willing to believe, there is a power greater than myself?"

Like the book says, upon that simple cornerstone a wonderfully effective spiritual structure can be built. Worked for them and works for me.

From the rest of your post, I think it's actually Step 1 where you are stuck. Do you still think that you can stay sober by not going to meetings and not working the Steps? Do you think that community organizing and half-hearted prayers are sufficient to recover? Maybe. And maybe not.

These aren't attacks. Just questions that you can ask yourself if you want to see where you really are in the Steps. Your sponsor should have pointed this out to you many months ago.