Even though I don't always agree with them on all things (keithj, yeahgr8, intention, Dee74); heck, I may even disagree with them on lotsa stuff, but here, they, and others, have made some great suggestions. In fact, I can't seem to think of any more (good ones, that is).
However, a couple of things have come to my mind--some things that perhaps need reiterating....Yes, keep looking for a new sponsor (one who sees the program, the road to recovery, through the steps, and not just meetings and trying to be abstinent). Also, as has been mentioned, remember that 'going to any lengths'/following a sponsor's directions/suggestions, do not mean 'anything' and/or 'all' a sponsor's suggestions (i.e.: like 'paint my fence' etc.); a sponsor's directions/suggestions should be firmly backed by what's in the BB. Folks here often mention the 'desperation' needed upon entering this recovery road-trip. Well, I could be wrong, but I think I've read some of that desperation in your posts (and that desperation is a good thing)..... (o:
In your first post here, you wrote, "... I don't believe I can stay sober for more than a month or two..."
HumbleBee touched on this a bit, so here's a bit more..... (o: Did you ever think that you only seem to get a month or two because that's all you're giving yourself permission for.....?
and one final note....I know there are lots of examples for what the A's in AA stand for, but I always liked Attitude Adjustment; that's exactly what I needed.....perhaps for u2....?.... to change the negative 'I do not believe' to the positive 'I can do this, with the help of others,' to change that one or two months to for good 'n all....? just a thought........ (o:
Here's to you, lmy, on this roqad of happy destiny.
NoelleR