Does anyone have experience/advice
I had to go back on NO CONTACT a few times , before I was ready for NO CONTACT. There is a reason he is your ex Mary. MY STBXAH would would do that every time to see if I was still there for HIM and his disease.It is not good for them or us if we keep being there for them.
Is he in recovery? Would you be interested if he is not in recovery? True recovery takes committment and hard work. Even then real sobriety can take a long time to happen.