Wow you guys are really awesome, I can't thank you enough for all your responses. I'm just so confused because I know a lot of people who do the same thing as me but it is likely that not everyone is going to develop a serious problem. I don't want to be "that girl" who everyone thinks is just making a big deal out of nothing just for attention which is totally not the case. I've seen my brother (3 years older than me) get in trouble a lot over the years for the same things. And now I'm following in his footsteps, but it doesn't seem to stop me, even after his recent DUI. I don't think people would care if I didn't drink or smoke, it's me that's stopping myself.
I can't resist that burning urge for the feeling of it again. I enjoy drinking an smoking socially with friends at parties and things. But the part that scares me is when I come home and lay in bed I think to myself how much I LOVE the feeling. Whether it be my vision spinning or body tingly and numb from being drunk or felling totally relaxed and almost as if my body is pulsing from being high. It's my realization of how much I love those feelings that keeps me from stopping. Even if I am able to resist for 6 months or something, I can't forever, eventually I am going to do it again, and once I get a taste of the feeling again I'm not gonna want to stop.
I guess I just really don't want it to develop into a major problem. It may or may not but is it worth it to just wait it out and see what happens? I really wish I had someone I trusted to talk to, but until I find someone, you guys are the best thing I have (i mean that in a good way) I really appreciate any advice I can get.