Why do I think he's sober just because he contacted me?
It's been a month, and I got an email. The first time he relapsed, he didn't contact me for months. When he did, I figured he had realized that he wanted to be sober and live a life with me, and that's why he was contacting me. That's what he said when I talked to him. We were together again for about a month (I think) when he relapsed again. He didn't contact me for about a week. When he finally did, I thought it was because he'd realized that he was so wrong for drinking, and that he wanted to be sober and live a life with me, and that's why he was contacting me. That's what he said when I talked to him. We were together again for a short while before he relapsed again.
It's been a month.
I got an email. He wants to talk to me.
I have been thinking all day today as if he's decided to be sober and live a life with me. Tonight, it finally dawned on me...he's an alcoholic on a rollercoaster. He doesn't know what he's doing.
Today, tomorrow, and hopefully forever - I'm staying the hell off the rollercoaster.
Just checking in. It's still heartbreaking, but I'm determined to heal.