LucyA

I decided to put the adoption on hold because Joes other aunt had told him if I adopted him I would change his name and never let him see her again. Completely untrue and already discussed between Joe and I, he knew I wouldn't change his name, he's the last in the line anyway and he's had his name for all his life, it's who he is, we decided it wouldn't be changed, he was happy.
He knew about contact too, nothing would change except legally I'd be his parent, absoultely nothing else would change, but he'd have the belonging that he so wanted then.
All the reports on us as a family were done, then they moved on to the wider family, our social worker was ready to recomend adoption, but when she kicked off and influenced Joe about it even she backed off.
I only put the adoption on hold because I didnt want Joe to feel pulled between the two fo us, and I explained that to him at the time.
I am so hoping social services have this on record as it would help me no end right now, but if they don't I do, dates names and the whole lot.

I've been way too soft with this woman, I know that now. All the time I did what I thought was best, allowing Joe to have a close relationship with his mums sister. They never were this close when his mum was alive.
If I could do all this over again I would do it completley different. But I can't, so now is the time to start.