Looooong before Facebook, if someone REALLY wanted to get in touch with you, there are other ways.
I too have had the Facebook delimma's, But mine was actually somewhat opposite, as soon as I even had a GLIMPSE that my XA was communicating with his ex again, I deleted him, that night in seconds, I did NOT want to see it.
Now granted, after that it has been up and down with the Facebook thing. That was 9 months ago. (wow, I didn't realize it had been that long!) And for 7 months I was a wreck over this man. I'm getting better. I even deleted my entire fb account in December to give myself some space.
I recently did start it back up. I will admit I have done a little snooping....and received one drunk email from him "apologizing", then after he sent it, a couple of weeks later he blocked me. (Gooooooood GRIEF!)
Facebook rules your life as much as you allow it to. Doesn't cutting that final tie need to be FINAL? The thing is that it already is final. This link just keeps it alive, but only in your mind. What about this "connection" are you holding on to?
You could delete your ENTIRE page, not just him, and the people that you want in your life and want to find you would find you. Facebook is simply a social networking site, it is not an emotional or physical connection to someone. It's technology.
If you delete him from your friends list....he's still on facebook. Personally, I think deleting him gives you your power back. It's actually extremely liberating! Wouldn't it be FABULOUS TO TAKE BACK YOUR POWER? You control you....he does not.
I know the struggle with this. But really, in the long run, you will realize how trivial deleting him off of your friends list really was.
You said "I wouldn't get back together with him if my life depended on it." ......then there is no need for him to have the privilage of viewing YOUR life on facebook. Who cares about his life....he doesn't get to see YOURS.
Hugs