suki4483, you are so right on about this! I have to step away from the whole situation because I don't think he will ever find the strength to walk away from them. They are very strong personalities and he isn't. I feel like not only did I lose my husband to addiction, but to his parents and that make me extremely sad. He has been told by a former psychiatrist that he was working with after he went into remission from Hodgkins Disease that he needed to distance himself from them. We also saw a therapist when we first found out about our infertility. A lot of emotions came up wth how his family handled his cancer so we had a family session with them. At the end the therapist took me aside and told me she always thought I exaggerated about them, but after meeting them wanted to apologize for ever doubting me. It really is a very crazy situation and I fear my husband won't ever get a spine when it comes to them. They honestly think they are helping my husband, but have very twisted thinking. It is a never ending battle because if I push my feelings about how involved and irrational they are they just push back that I don't love him, I don't want to see him better, I'm a money hungry bitch that only cares about him if there is a lot of money in my checking account.
Honestly, the best part about thinking of my life divorced from him is that I will have very little to do with them. I just wish my husband had the strength to break free from them sooner and maybe we might have made it.