Thank you Lotus. Very useful ideas. I'm very big into self-help, but yeah I just get so exhausted/sick of it.
I need to find a counselor...and I think I need some medication. I'm definitely pretty depressed. I've struggled with depression in the past and it can be very hard to dig myself out. I'm having a hard time staying present...I just think and how stupid I was! Dang!
Yeah I need a place to vent. The few friends that do understand the situation are probably just as sick of all this as I am..and frankly, I'm tired of talking about him and moving on. It all I think about, so its hard to engage with others sometimes. Yuck.