Originally Posted by
chicubs1 
I just completed 2 months in recovery and my wife increasingly thinks I am being selfish because I tell people I became sober for "me first". I realize that my drinking was a problem in our marriage, but never dreamed recovery would be too. I decided to go it alone without AA, but one of my best friends started his recovery with it and he has been a godsend with his advice and support. But my wife doesn't see it that way. She thinks we are just spending too much time together (as always has). She doesn't understand now that now it is way more than golf and hanging out etc. He really is the only person that understands what I am going through. Does anyone have any advice in dealing with a situation like this? I love her dearly, but she doesn't seem realize how stressful this is no matter what I say.
Editing. It's important to learn your audience and editing when talking to a spouse during this time can be a key element.
Instead of giving her the message "It's all about me"!
Remember this is your wife. Your companion. Change the words to be sensitive of her needs. Say something like this:
"The meetings and my own self-discovery are going to teach me to be a better husband for you".