As a man I relate with shame to the description of your husband spending quality time only on himself.
I have come to realize that is seems men are super selfish.
I realize that I need to work very, very hard at spending time with my kids.
For me it was easy to spend tons and tons of time with our first two kids. Then my wife's drinking came into the picture. I am trying to figure out how that plays into me not spending as much time with the kids.
I am still working on that, with sites like this helping me to think out and write out my thoughts.
It seems that in general men need to work harder at not being selfish with their time.