Hi Brittani welcome to this forum. I know wiser people with more experience will come along soon.
I wanted to tell you you are among friends here. We all get it.
To me this says it all
At some point he went and got more booze (He did this a few times).
How horrible it is to witness such denial and self destruction. The point is that he found the means to get more alcohol. IF you and me feel bad, we somehow get medical help right? we think they will seek help just like us.
But no. Active alcoholics are different.... don't try to get it, you would never get it unless you are an addict yourself.
Here we go by the following 3 Cs
You can't CONTROL his drinking
You didn't CAUSE him to drink
You can't CURE him
It sounds heartless but I get why the docs. were annoyed. There are innocent people needing help for diseases, accidents etc., while this person is ACTIVELY CHOOSING to drink. I do not think he is a poor victim, why? because I have been to AA and know other alcoholics have recovered and now lead great lives, truly changed.
If you smoke, you die. If you take drugs , drink , you die. You are choosing death. There's no way around it. He gets to decide what he wants to do. And you get to decide if you want to be part of a trainwreck or not.
An ex I had drank and drinks almost daily. When we broke up he told me he was planning to drink until the last day of his life. A year and a half later he keeps drinking, using people and not giving a damn about who may get hurt in his "living the wild life".
You seem a nice person and I would like to know more about you..... the person you describe has deep issues, and only fellow alcoholics, AA and the like can help him if he chooses to. Everybody knows where to get help, or finds out how to get help, just like you did joining this forum. He is not helpless. Perhaps if he loses you he may wake up to his reality. Perhaps he does not... perhaps he dies this way.
Only God, destiny, etc has the answer. Have you read the book "Codependent no more" by melody beattie?great great book that helped me when I was at a loss seeing BF drink, insult, drive, lie, manipulate etc. then drink more... I think their issues go wayyyyy before we even meet them.
HUGS