How to stay out of my own head and others?
I extended my FLMA for the month of March. Im not ready to go back to work. Im just starting pushing myself at home here to get off the couch, clean this house and trying to go out more. Doctor approved it, therapist said it was a great idea. Now I know Im doing this for myself, which means taking the time off and putting myself first.
I know Im a codie but didnt think to this point. I cried all the way to the doctors, in the office and on the way home. Scanned the note and had myself in such a tizzy over sending this to my boss. (sometimes he isnt the most caring guy but I worked my butt off to get where I am) I felt so guilty over taking the time off, worried about the extra work everyone is doing, thinking that they all are thinking Im weak or what ever. He did not respond to me but I talked to my assistant who said everything is fine and if she needs me she knows she can call me. She is doing just fine, which I knew she would and didnt need a temp to answer the phones.
How did it come to this? Ive never put myself first or did the right thing for myself. This is a very confusing feeling for me. Ive ready Melodys books over and over. I know I need this time to recover from AH death, be there for my daughter, and clean this dam house. Which room by room I have been doing, or taking a nap when I want too etc. So my question is has anyone else felt like this? I have therapy today and this is going to be my subject of the day.
I need to learn how to take or put myself and needs first without feelings of guilt, worry or weakness