Hi Dave, I can relate being a chronic relapser myself (and thinking "This time will be different... I can control it!")
I started reading a book called Sober For Good by Anne M. Fletcher. It has helped me to understand why my past attempts to quit drinking have failed and what to do differently going forward. She also offers alternatives to AA in case that isn't a good fit for you/the reader. I went to a few AA meetings, and while everyone was friendly and helpful, I did feel a little out of place.
I'm trying SMART recovery -- which is an alternative to AA, in addition to following some of the advice from the book I'm reading.
Good luck -- You can do it!!!