When I first began my road to recovery, upon entering AA, I was always on the lookout for differences between me and others. Now I hunt for what we share in common.
Seems as if you react to alcohol differently than many "social" drinkers. It has enough impact on your mind that you've found yourself here. I was depressed when I had been drinking, then found myself dry for a few days. I couldn't be happy w/o booze. AA, though, is teaching me how to do just that.
I'd recommend glancing through the opening sections of Alcoholics Anonymous's text:
A.A. Big Book
Read through the Doctor's Opinion and keep going, if you like. You might find what you're looking for!
Anyway, welcome!