callie i agree with insulated, turn off the phone or use your caller id if you have one. when i decided i was done, i found it a lot easier for me to not know anything at all about when/if my ah went awol, using or whatever else he decided to do with his life. knowing did keep me worried and it kept me stuck. i had to set boundaries with my inlaws, i don't mind converting with them as long as we don't have to talk about ah and whatever is going on with him, at least til i'm in a better place mentally and emotionally.