Hi Requiem
Welcome to SR. I smoked weed for a long time. I know the catch of kinda wanting to but not wanting to - I think we all do, regardless of our drug of choice.
The only way that worked for me was quitting - full stop. Kinda half way sorta stopping never worked for me.
The important thing is to take it a day at a time - and reach out for support whenever you need it. SR is great for that - the people here helped me decide what I had to do.
You may find you need outside, real life, support too - there's a giant list of recovery resources in our substance abuse forum, if you want to take a look.
http://www.soberrecovery.com/forums/...i-recover.html
D