About me
Hello everyone, my name's Luis I'm 18 years old and I'm an addict. Though my drug of choice is marijuana, I'm addicted to doing all drugs in general, whether it be oxy, xanax, booze, ecstasy, lsd or shrooms, I just must not be sober I'm also addicted to cigarettes, I smoke about 3-7 a day. When I'm sober the only thing on my mind is getting high on something, the only thing I want to do is get high, this has lead me to become basically anti social, and depressed. I spend a lot of time by myself or with my girlfriend, but she works and goes to school essentially full time, so I'm mainly by myself most of the time. I had a best friend for almost 10 years, we became addicts together, we would steal, con and rob people, whatever just to get high. Our friendship ended when he started taking me for a fool, trying to bull **** me and had become a compulsive liar, not to mention he watched me get stabbed in a fight.
I went to rehab when I was 15 for stealing a gold chain from my mom, for $20 worth of weed (Pathetic, I know) I ended up getting kicked out of rehab after 30 days because I disrespected the staff. I dropped out of high school at 16 and moved to my dads house, ended up going to job corps and got my GED. I decided to do something with my life and applied at my city's college and got accepted. I have come to realize lately that I'm depressed, I have low self esteem and a complete lack of motivation, I can't stop smoking weed, I have a job, my own car and go to school but I'm doing poorly in school 'cause I don't have motivation to study and do what I have to do to get good grades, I have everything going for me but I don't like doing anything but getting high, everything is so dull and boring when I'm sober.
My depression is killing me inside, I feel so empty and lost in this world, I just lack the will power and motivation to quit smoking weed, because I know for a fact and feel that weed is the source of my problems, I just can't, and don't really want to stop, but at the same time I do... It's what is driving me crazy. All of this is what has lead me to this place today, before you. I want to make changes, I just need help, I don't know how to stop. I have been smoking weed for 7 years, and every day for the last 3 or 4, so I'm here today to hopefully learn from someone else whose been through what I'm going through, and learn to live sober.